My background is in Business and Industrial Counseling and Project Leadership.  Developing and maintaining a balanced lifestyle personally and corporately is vital to avoid burnout.  I have taught time management and find that it is not a one and done activity.  You need to review your plan once or twice a year.  You also need to take into consideration any changes that have come into your life like: illness, children/grandchildren, job change, or any other activities (self chosen or mandated by others) that may have become part of your routine.

I will run you through an abbreviated “Time Management” session within this blog.  This could be a 1 to 2 day workshop.  You can take the general concepts and spend additional time on your personal specifics to establish a healthy lifestyle that includes your family, your work, and others within your sphere of influence.

1. Make a list

Make a list (in a schedule format or the 24-hr segment) of all the things you do within a day.  At this point you are just calculating how much time you spend completing each activity (not at what time you complete them).  Realize that some days are different from others and you may need to create two or three versions (ex. M, W, F are the same, however, Tuesday and Thursday are different).  You can then decide if you want to make a list that includes Saturday and Sunday.

Often I use a 24-hr segmented circle and fill in the segments like this.

My non committed time is used for me to write my blogs, Bible study, cook, pay bills, stay in touch with family and friends, read news feeds, and watch movies with my husband.  During the school year, my non committed time is used creating lesson plans and grading papers.  I will be filling my non committed time soon with academic activities to maintain my teaching certification.  8-hours of non committed time is enough to hold a second job.  However, everyone at different times in their lives will find their non committed time will vary due to the stage of life and responsibilities they possess.

2. Take Away From Your List

Look at your list and decide if there is something you don’t like.  Do you spend too much time driving to and from “somewhere?”  Do you not get enough sleep?  Is there no time for your “favorite” hobby or activity?  Jot these observations down so you can come back to them later.

3. Add To Your List

Now decide if there is anything that you would like to add to your schedule.  Time to go back to school?  Time to spend with family?  Time to garden or paint?  Jot these observations down so you can come back to them later.

4. Delegate or Eliminate Needless Tasks

From your original list, determine if there is anything that is not your responsibility and you can delegate or stop.  This may take some time in thinking.  It also may be where you could spend a little extra money to have someone do for you, what you really don’t have time to do for yourself.  There are more and more services that deliver groceries and online ordered items right to your door.

My sister and I have an elderly mother that needs a caregiver.  At first we thought she needed a 24-7 caregiver after returning home from an Assisted Living facility.  However, after several months, we found she really only needed someone two times a week for a couple of hours each day.  My sister most often can order the groceries online and pick them up at the door or have them delivered to Mom.  The pharmacy delivers Mom’s meds and other supplies as needed.  My sister works full time, I don’t live in the area, and there is no way my sister can meet all of Mom’s needs and stay mentally, emotionally, and spiritually healthy.  It cost, but it is well worth it. With children or co-workers you may be able to create a carpool or a coop that shares responsibilities. Consider creative ways to streamline or reduce the burden of your responsibilities.

5. Group Tasks Together

From the original list, determine if there are activities that can be grouped together in a bundle so as not to be “running with your head cut off?”  Do you need to make a weekly or monthly grocery list that consolidates your shopping?

Here are some of my suggestions that I have worked on over the years.

• If I need to make phone calls, I lump them into morning and afternoon calls.  I allow 15-30 minutes total for each set of calls.  These can be either personal or business.  If I’m in the middle of another activity and I see it isn’t an urgent call, I don’t answer the phone and call back later.  I can then schedule longer family calls with kids, grandkids, and other family members during the week as I have time allotted.

• Paying the bills has always made my head hurt (even typing this sentence it started).  I’m very thankful through God’s grace paying bills really isn’t as stressful as it was in the early days of adulthood.  However, the anxiety still rises up.  Therefore, I’ve lumped my bills into batches (very similar to the phone calls).  I sit down and pay any bills that are to be paid between the 1st – 5th.  I have no more bills due until the 15th.  I don’t even worry about them and only pull them out on that day and pay them.  Then I pay any remaining bills from the 20th – 30th on the 20th of each month.  I’ve created my own file system so that the amounts, the phone numbers, and online accesses are easily available and it has reduced the time I have had to spend on a very uncomfortable, but necessary activity in my life.

6. Fill Your Time Intentionally

After you have deleted, delegated, or batched activities from your original list, determine how much extra time you have now created.  Even if it is only 30 minutes you have gained, you now need to decide what activity can fill that time.  You also will want to keep an eye on your daily activities because you may be able to find other time that may be wasted without you realizing how it is robbing you of “productive” time.  How much time do you spend on social media?  How much time do you spend vegging out watching T.V.?  You may be able to convert some of these times to more “productive” activities you have listed that you would like to add to your life.

As you continue to review your activities in an ongoing fashion, you will find that it becomes easier to make decisions to add, delete, or delegate from your scheduled activities and create balance for you and your family.

The post 6 Steps to Restore Balance In Your Life appeared first on 93.7 The Light.

Graced For Your Race

Taylor: “I don’t think I’ve mastered the art of learning how to balance everything perfectly in my life. There’s a lot of days where I call [Robert] crying, just because sometimes it’s so overwhelming between him traveling and 2 babies under 2 and one on the way- just life in general. I find myself beating myself up a lot. I feel like if I’m satisfying Robert’s needs, then my babies are lacking. If my babies and my husband are doing great, if they’re not lacking for anything, my spiritual life is lacking. So, I’m constantly beating myself up because an area is lacking in my life. I usually just have to take a step back, and [Robert] helps me with this, and just reminds me that I’m human- I’m one person and I need grace, but ultimately one thing the Holy Spirit always speaks to me is, ‘Taylor, you’re graced for this.’

So many people say, ‘Taylor, I don’t know how you do what you do.’ And then I look at their life and I say, ‘I don’t know how you do what you do!’ But ultimately, it’s because I’m not graced to be who they are. I’m graced to be Taylor Madu, Robert Madu’s wife, and so with that being said, that’s what I keep in the forefront of my mind and in our home, that before the very foundation of the earth, God knew the plans He had for Robert, for me, and for our children.”

“Sometimes you have to be careful because things can become a competition, like sending Daddy out for ministry vs. family and all that, but I don’t think it has to be that way, I think we just kind of do it all together. If there’s an area that’s lacking, we take a step back, we acknowledge the area that’s lacking, and we give attention to it and then we move forward. I don’t know if you’ll ever learn to balance it all perfectly…but I think it’s important to never create that competition.”

No For Now

Robert: “We don’t even like to use that term ‘balance’ because to me, balance just gives that imagery of you have all of these precious vessels that are important to you on a tightrope and you’re trying to hold it all together and if you’re not careful, you’ll start to put all these things against each other. Like, oh no, this is ministry time and this is family time. We just try to be good stewards of everything God has put under our jurisdiction. That takes reflection, that takes stepping back, that takes saying, ‘No for now, maybe later. That’s not for this season.’ For instance, I just got back from New Zealand. I was preaching there and I was gone for 11 days and preached 14 times. That was 1 of 2 international trips I took this year, but after getting back I saw [Taylor’s] face and she was like, ‘that was your last international trip. Put your passport away. You are staying in these United States of America.’ So I was like, ‘Ok.’ We just made the decision that for right now, I am not doing international trips because for this season with our kids, I cannot be gone for 10 days. I can do a trip here and there, but that’s just for this season. 

There are different guardrails we put in. One of the things we do is at Easter, Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, and holidays, those are days that I don’t care who you are calling me to come preach, I’m not going. We’re going to go to church as a family. That’s just some different guardrails that we’ve put in.”

Taylor: “I think so many times in ministry, because I grew up in a pastor’s home, so many times it’s like ‘God has to be first’  but God is in us and with us. It’s not like He’s separate from that, so I feel like sometimes people feel the pressure that they have to put their ministry above their family and I think if you’re out ministering to the world and He’s changing lives, yet the home life is suffering, something’s wrong.”

The Danger of Comparison

Robert: “Comparison is the thief of joy. This is one of the messages God has given me the mandate to tell the body of Christ because social media has changed the landscape of life. It’s amazing how you can be so content with where you are and so happy, but then all of a sudden awareness drives discontentment. Can you imagine how happy you would be with your spouse if you just didn’t know, but now you have notifications on your smart device that’s making you stupid. We will take social media breaks and just keep our eyes on who Jesus is and what He has called us to do. It’s a slippery slope when you start playing the comparison game and nothing will steal your joy more than looking at somebody else. And let’s be honest, it’s not real. We’ll laugh sometimes, we’ll post a picture and somebody will comment, ‘Awww, we just want what you guys have.’ 

Taylor: “And we’re like, ‘you don’t know us! You don’t know what we have. I’d be careful about saying that!’ It’s so easy to put anything out that you want to paint this false persona. There are so many family pictures we take that look perfect, but it took us 10 billion photos to get that picture. But that sums up social media. It’s not realistic. I encourage everyone to just be you and remember, you’re graced for your race.”

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