Mother’s Day is on the way, and for some people, that brings to mind Hallmark cards, flowers, chocolates, and brunch. That’s not true for everyone, though. For some, Mother’s Day is a painful reminder of something that’s missing…maybe their relationship with their Mom is strained, nonexistent, or their Mom has passed away- or on the other hand, maybe they haven’t been able to have children as they hoped- they’ve miscarried, faced infertility, or lost a child. No card or gift will be coming to them this May. 

Happy Mother’s Day

If you’re part of the first group and Mother’s Day is a happy celebration, take some time to think about how you can honor other people in your life on Mother’s Day in addition to your own mother. Are there women in your life who may not have their own children but who have loved and supported you? Do you know a woman longing for a child that you can encourage with flowers, a card, or a phone call? 

“…now that I am a mother, I understand what Mother’s Day is about: it’s about looking through our lives and recognizing the act of mothering everywhere we see it, and more than that, recognizing that when any of us mother– when we listen, nurture, nourish, protect–we’re doing sacred work.”

Shauna Niequist

Filling The Void

If you’re part of the second group, where Mother’s Day has been a day of sadness, anger, or pain, maybe it’s time for some new traditions. Think of some ways to redeem the day. There are probably other people in your life struggling in the same way you are, and your effort to change your perspective could be healing to them as well. In the same way, single ladies sometimes celebrate “Galentine’s Day” on February 14. You could use the day in a more untraditional way. You could celebrate the mother-figures you know by delivering flowers, have lunch with another woman longing for a baby for prayer together, or go someplace special and remember the good things about your Mom. Your new tradition should address the longing you feel. Pray about it and let God show you where your heart needs healing. 

The Act of Mothering

Perhaps you’re not a mother yet, or you’re past the age when you can bear your own children. Look around at the people in your life- do you see anyone hungry for a mother? This could be someone of any age…a child who needs attention, guidance, love…or an adult who needs advice, support, or encouragement. Small acts of kindness and just being there to talk make a bigger difference than you could imagine. If you don’t know anyone personally who you could help in this way, you could look into volunteer opportunities, such as churches, schools, hospitals, etc. 

Titus gives us a beautiful picture of older women mentoring younger women. Many young women in our churches need a mother figure to help them through the journey of being a Christian woman, a wife, and/or a mother, and if you have experience in any of those areas, you have the wisdom to pass on!

 “Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.”

Titus 2.3-5

This Mother’s Day, let’s all look a little further than our immediate circle. Life has been hard, and for some holidays feel like a personal insult. What can you do to make the day easier for someone in your life? Let us know in the comments if you have other ideas to make Mother’s Day better for someone.