John Quincy Adams wrote often to his mother, Abigail Adams, even as an adult. And what stands out isn’t anything dramatic. It’s the tone.

Respect. Thoughtfulness. A kind of steady connection that didn’t seem to fade with time.

In one letter, he writes:

“My conduct through life has been much influenced by your instructions and example.”

That’s not something you write casually. It’s the kind of thing you say after time has passed – after you have made your own decisions and lived with the results. After you’ve had enough time and distance to see what actually shaped you.

What Stands Out

He doesn’t write like someone who has moved on from needing or loving his mother. He sounds like someone who still values her. You see it in the way he addresses her:

“My ever honored and revered Mamma . . .”

There is respect there. And affection. A steadiness that doesn’t fade, even as he gets older.

In the same letter as above, he reflects on the kind of life he wants to live:

“My conduct through life has been much influenced by your instructions and example and I hope I shall always act so as to do justice to your instructions. I feel more and more the importance of those principles which you early instilled into me.”

He isn’t writing this as a child trying to please his mother. He’s writing as a grown man who had already stepped into his own responsibilities, and he’s telling her that what she taught him still matters – and that he’s thinking about it, even as an adult.

That’s what stands out.

As adults, it’s easy for that relationship to shift into something more distant – less conversation, less asking, less sharing. Not necessarily on purpose. Just slowly.

But his letters don’t feel like that. They feel like someone who still sees his mother as someone worth listening to, worth honoring – not out of obligation but because he genuinely values her.

Bringing It Closer to Home

Most of us aren’t writing long letters anymore. Life is faster, and communication is usually shorter.

But the larger question remains.

Do we still talk to our mothers like that?

Do we still treat them as people worth listening to carefully?

Do we speak to them with patience?

Not out of duty – but real conversation.

Do we ask what they think?

Do we take the time to listen?

Do we tell them what’s actually going on?

As adults, our relationship with our mothers often changes in quiet ways. It’s easy to let meaningful conversations with your mother get replaced by quick updates. Staying connected to your mother as an adult doesn’t usually happen automatically as life gets busy.

As adults, learning how to communicate well with your parents – and especially your mother – takes more intention than it used to. Relationships naturally change over time, but they can also be strengthened in small, consistent ways.

A Small Shift

It doesn’t have to be complicated.

A phone call that isn’t rushed.

A question you actually wait for the answer to.

Taking a few minutes to listen instead of moving on.

Those small choices often shape the relationship with your mother over time more than we realize. And over time, they may matter more than we think. Because what you see in Adam’s letter isn’t just respect – it’s a relationship that didn’t fade as life moved on.

And that doesn’t happen by accident.

The post A Letter From a Son to His Mother – What It Shows About Our Mothers appeared first on 93.7 The Light.

Do we ignore the signs God placed in the Bible and chalk them up to a different time and excuse ourselves from the reality that God is the original architect of waiting longer and lingering? “By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done” (Genesis 2:2-3 NIV). God didn’t rest because He was tired, He rested to demonstrate a pattern of living that included fellowship with Him outside of work.

Waiting longer and lingering in God’s presence creates an atmosphere of PEACE. Jesus is the Prince of Peace. God has been calling His loved ones into a place of lingering longer since day seven of creation, and reiterates that call in Psalm 46:10, “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” God’s very existence should entice us to draw nearer to Him and experience His overwhelming omnipresence.

It is interesting to find that individuals showcased in the Bible that waited and lingered longer had an extra portion of peace, power, and purpose. Joshua in the book of Exodus is one of those individuals. Joshua was the loyal attendant, military commander, and designated successor of Moses. This great responsibility was because in Exodus 33:11 we see the character and practice of Joshua. “The LORD would speak to Moses face to face, as one speaks to a friend. Then Moses would return to the camp, but his young aide Joshua son of Nun did not leave the tent.” Joshua went on to lead the Israelites across the Jordan River, into the Promised Land and conquer the “giants” and secure what God had promised. Warring victory can only come from lingering longer in God’s presence before we tackle the struggles that face us.

Hannah in 1 Samuel 1 lingered longer in the temple, crying and despairing for a child that humanly was impossible because of her infertility. “In her deep anguish Hannah prayed to the LORD, weeping bitterly. As she kept on praying to the LORD, Eli observed her mouth. Hannah was praying in her heart, and her lips were moving but her voice was not heard. Eli thought she was drunk” (1 Samuel 1:10, 12-13 NIV). Hannah’s extended time lingering longer in the presence of the LORD miraculously opened her womb and she became pregnant and gave birth to Samuel. Samuel’s purpose was showcased in the books of 1 and 2 Samuel. He was a mighty man of God for his time that was birthed from his mother’s prayers.

In the New Testament (Luke 10:38-42), the sisters Mary and Martha (the sisters of Lazarus) represent the modern pattern of busyness. Jesus had come to spend time with the family and Martha was busy with the food and house preparations to make sure everything was wonderful for her guests. Jesus was talking to the guests. Mary was sitting at His feet, waiting and lingering longer at the tremendous words spilling out to the emotionally and spiritually hungry individuals in His presence. Martha was appalled that Mary was sitting at Jesus’ feet and not helping her in the kitchen. Martha even confronts Jesus and asks Him to make Mary come and help her. Jesus’ reply, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed – or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” More than our physical busyness, God desires our sitting at His (Jesus’) feet lingering longer.

Finally, Jesus also demonstrated as God did on that seventh day of creation, the need to linger longer and enjoy the fellowship God intended outside of work. This fellowship refreshed, rejuvenated, and empowered Jesus to complete His earthly ministry all the way to the cross. It is recorded at least nine times in the Bible that Jesus retreated from the crowds to be alone with God.

Since God and Jesus both found it important to pull away from the busyness of work to enjoy fellowship of God’s presence to refresh, rejuvenate, and empower the realignment with the peace, power, and purpose of God, shouldn’t we also do the same? Let’s not count lingering longer in God’s presence as wasted time. It is essential time to our physical, mental, and spiritual health. It is time that builds our “Full Armor of God” to withstand the attacks of the enemy (Ephesians 16:10-18). God has provided, through His and Jesus’ examples, that lingering longer in His presence is vital to our successful navigation of the modern day stressors.

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Whether you have a small patio, a sunny balcony, or just a corner by your kitchen door, growing fruits and vegetables in pots and containers is a practical way to enjoy fresh, homegrown produce. Container gardening saves space and gives you more control over the soil, sunlight, water, and pests. It is perfect for city homes, renters, and those who just may not be able to get out there in a full-size garden. But not every plant thrives in confined spaces, so here is a realistic guide to the best fruits and vegetables to grow in containers for a successful harvest.

Top Vegetables That Grow Well in Pots

Tomatoes. Well, technically a fruit, according to my son, but tomatoes are one of the most popular container foods. Choose a dwarf version or a variety that stays smaller, like Patio Princess or Bush Early Girl. Use a pot at least 5 gallons in size and place it where it can get 6-8 hours of sun every day.

Peppers. Bell peppers, banana peppers, and chili peppers all do well in containers. They love warm weather and full sun. Use a 3–5-gallon pot and keep the soil consistently moist.

Lettuce and Greens. Loose-leaf lettuce, kale, and spinach grow quickly and do not need deep pots. 6 inches is deep enough. They like partial shade and cooler temperatures, so they even grow in the fall.

Radishes. These are ideal for beginners because they are fast-growing and small and can be harvested in just a few weeks. Do not plant them all at once and you can keep your harvest going.

Carrots. Choose short or round varieties like Thumbelina or Little Finger. Use a deep container (at least 12 inches) with loose, sandy soil for best results.

Green Beans. Bush beans work better than pole beans for this. They grow quickly and do not need much space. They just need full sun and regular watering.

Best Fruits to Grow in Containers

Strawberries. Strawberries grow well in hanging baskets, window boxes, or traditional pots. They need at least 6 hours of sunlight and well-drained soil. Ever-bearing or day-neutral varieties will provide multiple harvests. (Day-neutral plants produce throughout the season, not just at a specific time and fruit despite the length of daylight.)

Blueberries. I saw you can grow “regular” blueberries in pots, but a dwarf variety just seems more doable to me. Blueberries prefer acidic soil, which is easy to maintain in pots. Growing at least two different varieties will allow for cross-pollination and more fruit – mature dwarf plants yield 3-5 pounds of fruit. And they have beautiful colors in the fall.

Dwarf Citrus Trees. Another beautiful addition to your deck or patio, dwarf lemons, limes, and oranges are ideal for containers. Meyer lemons, a dwarf variety, have fragrant blossoms, can self-pollinate, and tolerate moving indoors for the winter. They need sun and well-drained soil but produce sweeter and less acidic fruit.

Figs. There are dwarf varieties of fig trees, like Petite Negra, that do not require a lot of space to grow. They need full sun and a container that holds at least 10 gallons of soil.

A few final tips to make your patio garden a success: use potting mix, choose the right size container with proper drainage, water consistently – most containers do dry out faster than the ground – and choose plants that match your climate and space. With the right selection and care, container gardening can produce an impressive amount of fresh food right outside your door.

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Of course, we will see them. They’ll be home for (most) breaks and for the summer. But it will be different – they will be different. They have lived on their own to some extent and have taken care of themselves. While they will still expect you to do their laundry, they have a new sense of self-sufficiency and an expectation of freedom, whether we think they are ready for it or not. And if you try to relate to them the way you did while they were younger, I think you will find it doesn’t go very well for you. You’ll be frustrated and hurt.

So at this back-to-school time, here are a few lessons we can practice to make this adjustment a little easier on our hearts. The first thing – and this isn’t just a platitude – is to pray. God knows this is hard, and He knows what both we and our children need. He will give us the wisdom we need to navigate this new stage of life, comfort to heal our hearts, grace to love well and to do and say the right things, and mercy for when we don’t. Put your child in God’s care.

A second help is to make use of your memories, when they come to mind naturally and intentionally. Look at pictures or old videos with your kids, and do a lot of, “Remember when. . .” The time we have with our children is so short. Recalling the good memories can stretch out that time in our hearts.

A third practice is to make memories now. It will probably be more difficult to get your kids to do things with you than it was when they were young, but now that you know how short the time really is and how valuable memories are, intentionally planning fun things to do or even making a spontaneous trip to a coffee shop will be easier to make a priority.

The last lesson I would suggest is to work on yourself. You knew when you became a parent that the job isn’t forever. Your whole purpose was to care for, nurture, teach, and love them so that they would leave well – your parenting job was only ever meant to be temporary. You haven’t lost your purpose. You are missing your kids, but you still have the rest of your life ahead of you, now with time to fill with new activities. Look for ways to make new friends, learn new skills or revive whatever you put aside to be a mom or dad. Volunteer, mentor a young person. Keep up your fellowship with the people at church. Renew your relationship with your spouse and with God. Your relationship with your kids is changing, but you are still a child of God. He will be your comfort and hope through all the changes of life.

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Happy Mother’s Day

If you’re part of the first group and Mother’s Day is a happy celebration, take some time to think about how you can honor other people in your life on Mother’s Day in addition to your own mother. Are there women in your life who may not have their own children but who have loved and supported you? Do you know a woman longing for a child that you can encourage with flowers, a card, or a phone call? 

“…now that I am a mother, I understand what Mother’s Day is about: it’s about looking through our lives and recognizing the act of mothering everywhere we see it, and more than that, recognizing that when any of us mother– when we listen, nurture, nourish, protect–we’re doing sacred work.”

Shauna Niequist

Filling The Void

If you’re part of the second group, where Mother’s Day has been a day of sadness, anger, or pain, maybe it’s time for some new traditions. Think of some ways to redeem the day. There are probably other people in your life struggling in the same way you are, and your effort to change your perspective could be healing to them as well. In the same way, single ladies sometimes celebrate “Galentine’s Day” on February 14. You could use the day in a more untraditional way. You could celebrate the mother-figures you know by delivering flowers, have lunch with another woman longing for a baby for prayer together, or go someplace special and remember the good things about your Mom. Your new tradition should address the longing you feel. Pray about it and let God show you where your heart needs healing. 

The Act of Mothering

Perhaps you’re not a mother yet, or you’re past the age when you can bear your own children. Look around at the people in your life- do you see anyone hungry for a mother? This could be someone of any age…a child who needs attention, guidance, love…or an adult who needs advice, support, or encouragement. Small acts of kindness and just being there to talk make a bigger difference than you could imagine. If you don’t know anyone personally who you could help in this way, you could look into volunteer opportunities, such as churches, schools, hospitals, etc. 

Titus gives us a beautiful picture of older women mentoring younger women. Many young women in our churches need a mother figure to help them through the journey of being a Christian woman, a wife, and/or a mother, and if you have experience in any of those areas, you have the wisdom to pass on!

 “Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.”

Titus 2.3-5

This Mother’s Day, let’s all look a little further than our immediate circle. Life has been hard, and for some holidays feel like a personal insult. What can you do to make the day easier for someone in your life? Let us know in the comments if you have other ideas to make Mother’s Day better for someone.

The post When Mother’s Day Doesn’t Feel Like A Celebration appeared first on 93.7 The Light.

6 Free Self-Care Ideas

Taking care of yourself doesn’t have to be expensive or especially time-consuming. Here are 6 ideas inspired by Jim Daly’s “:30 Spots of Hope”

1. Soak in a bubble bath after everyone else has gone to bed or in the morning before they get up. Take a break from your phone and the tv…try just to relax, pray, and give your stress and anxiety to the Lord. 
2. Have lunch in a park or your yard. The idea is to change up your routine a little…get out of the house and get some fresh air. Take notice of the beauty of God’s creation and how richly He has provided for us. 

“The heavens proclaim the glory of God. The skies display his craftmanship. Day after day they continue to speak; night after night they make him known.” 

Psalm 19.1 NLT

3. Get some exercise. It doesn’t have to be the same kind of working out you do at a gym. Get the kids involved- have a dance party, teach the kids “Simon Says,” or play hide and seek outside. 
4. Work on a hobby you’ve neglected or pick up a new one! Bonus points if you recycle things from around the house for your projects!
5. If you enjoy cooking, cook a healthy and delicious meal. If you’re out of kitchen inspiration, set up an email recipe exchange and get some fresh ideas to liven up your meal routine. Up the stress-relief factor by listening to music or an audiobook while you cook. 
6. Reconnect with family or friends you haven’t talked to in a while. Reminisce and laugh together. You might be surprised how refreshed you’ll feel after you take a little time to do something for yourself.

“A cheerful heart is good medicine…”

Proverbs 17.22a NLT

Hopefully, these ideas have given you some ways to take a break and take care of yourself. Comment below and let us know some of the “self-care” things you do.

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